Meeting the person that God says I am

“The greatest tragedy in life is not death, but a life without a purpose.” Myles Munroe

The greatest tragedy is to live a life that is not aligned with God's purpose for your life. Remember your Maker has the ultimate manual of your existence and therefore knows where you should be & what you should be doing. Our quest then should be to become the persons that God says we are and not what people say we are.

You see there is a person that you know me to be, a person that you may want me to be and a person that I may present myself to be. But there is also a person that God says I am and that's the person I would like to meet. In fact my biggest failure in life would be for me not to become the person that God says I am.

So who is this person?

David in the book of Psalm 8: 3-9 asks God a question in relation to mankind and the care that He has for us. He says "What is man that You are mindful of him, and the son of man that You care for him? Yet You have made him a little lower than God, and you have crowned him with glory and honor. You made him to have dominion over the works of Your hands, You have put all things under his feet. All sheep and oxen, yes, and the beasts of the field. The birds  of the air, and the fish of the sea, and whatever passes along the paths of the seas."

David's awe of how much God cares and the amount of authority that He has bestowed upon me is justified. The fact that God trusts me with the work of His hands is a prestige that I have to live up to but I am still found wanting because I don't esteem myself as He does me. He has made me a little lower than Himself and yet the maximum output of this person is not even at 0.01%. If you consider His greatness and the stature of His power, then you'll understand what I mean when I say that, I have not even reached a fraction of the person that He says I am.

In the book of 1 John 4:4 says " Little children, you are of God and have already defeated and overcome them [agents of the anti-Christ], because he Who lives in you is greater than he who is in the world." 1 John 5:4 " For whatever is born of God is victorious over the world, and this is the victory that conquers the world, even our faith." So God sees me as His child, He grants me a status of being one who overcomes by virtue of being His. I am not a victim but a victor and if He amends my status then I must live up to it. My status is already documented in the book of life but yet I still live below the bar that He has set for me.

In Romans 8:37 "Yet amid all these things we are more than conquerors and gain surpassing victory though Him Who loved us." So my failures don't define  me. How you see me does not define me. Your perception of my inadequacies no matter accurate you may think you are, are not the ultimate construct of who God says I am. My successes are also not the perfect reflection of who He says I am. I am not what I present myself to be and my chase is simply to be, even if it's a fraction of it, the person that God says I am. You see I am a person under-construction. I am person in search of & yearning to meet the ultimate Me.

The ultimate me is a construct that God has already defined. A decree that has already been scripted in His word and He's word is truth. I choose to dedicate my life in chase of this meet because my purpose & it's fulfillment hangs on it. It is my quest to align myself with this person so that my posture is reflective of the greatness that He has bestowed upon me. The dynasty of my natural birth, no matter how rich or poor is not the final arbiter of my true identity. I am born of God, that is who I am and that's who He says I am. So when I don't accept your definition of who you say I am, it is not because I disrespect you but I am on the chase to meet the man that God says I am. After all He knew me before I was in my mother's womb and ordained long before you knew me. Ladies & gentlemen, I am on mission to meet Me as articulated by my Maker so I suggest you do the same.

The Self-Love Poem

Self-love tells me that the sun maybe shining on all of us but it's on me that it centers it's light.

Self-love tells me that though it rains on all of us but it's my garden that it waters.

Self-love also tells me that the stars glow on on us all but's on me that they glitter.

It's self-love that inspires me to elevate myself above my haters.

It's the self-love phenomenon that tells me that am beautiful even when others believe otherwise.

I become selfish at times and my quests are justified in self-love.

Self-love illuminates my sense of being.

Self-love is my essence.

But self-love is not enough if not shared with others.

Self-love is only complete when loving other in the same energy expressed towards myself.

Self-love tells me that others have to find expression in my love quest also.

Self-love inspires me to do unto others as I would like them to do unto me,

Self-love validates me & helps share me with the world.

Nelson Mandela once said "Love comes more naturally to the human heart than hate."

Desire is a tool to godliness

The word desire simply translated means "a strong feeling of wanting to have something or wishing for something to happen". I loosely translate it to mean that what you desire you don't have and not because you don't have the ability to have it but that the passion of that feeling of wanting to have that something has to be sustained. You have to keep at it.

I want to base this from a scripture that I love from Romans 7:14-25. I like what Paul puts forward as our daily struggle I believe. The innate desire to want to serve God faithfully and without fail but in full contrast to that desire dwells the appetites and wills of the flesh that naturally prison one to sin. What Paul is saying here is that not living a spiritual life is not due to lack of desire but that "evil is ever present with me and I am subject to its insistent demands". In verse 22 he says "For I endorse and delight in the Law of God in my inmost self [with my new nature]. He admits that being born again has not gotten him immune to the lust of the flesh. This is one of the most intriguing books in the bible, Paul bears all to these guys because he seeks to bring them closer God.

What brings me to write about this is that we mostly measure and pass judgement on each other based on things that we don't want to do but pay less attention on the desire to want to do good. You see my actions may not always reflect my desire but what I do is easy because the nature that indwells me demands contrary to my desire. So my mechanism is more in tuned to that which comes naturally to do. So by implication it will take much more strength and ability to be able to do this because the power that I need to be able to do this has to come from the supernatural to be able to subdue these demands and eventually to turn the tables around.

You need to stop concentrating on what you don't want to do but figure out ways to fuel your desire. Once you understand that honing & harnessing your desire will bring you much closer to godliness. Desire is not a problem, working on it is. Don't just stop at the door of desire but the company you keep must reflect your yearning & wanting to be freed from slavery. Remember that God will always grant you your heart's desires Psalms 37:4 but you must delight in Him. So this means that delighting in Him is actually working on your desire. Psalms 20:4 reads "May He grant you according to your heart's desire and fulfill all your plans". So God does not have a problem with what you desire because it is not naturally inherent in your sinful nature but lust, greed and all those appetites that automatically war against your desire to seek & search for righteousness; He loathes.

It is my wish that we can all come to a point where desire to do good overcomes that which comes habitually to do. I want us to learn to see beyond the actions that we do, to see if the desire is there. If we find that there is a desire in there; then put all our energies into making sure that, that desire is realized. Paul in verse 24 & 25 closes with a question & an answer which is Jesus our Lord and Savior. It is this virtue that keeps this desire alive; understanding that God knows the difficulty of living in this body. He holds no grudges for our shortcomings, in fact he continues to search & examines the desires of our hearts and that by His grace we are given a chance to make amends daily. Jeremiah says "it is because of His mercies that we are not consumed".

 Lastly Paul says "Therefore, my dear one, as you have always obeyed [my suggestions], so now, not only [with the enthusiasm you would show] in my presence but much more because I am absent, work out(cultivate, carry out to the goal, and fully complete) your own salvation with reverence and awe and trembling (self-distrust, with serious caution, tenderness of conscience, watchfulness against temptation, timidly shrinking from whatever might offend God and discredit the name of Christ).". Keep working on your desire because it will surely lead to godliness.

Workshopped by L Madubela

Beyond the fall of the statues

Wow! What interesting times we live in, in SA. There is always something to wake to in our country & we manage to lap up all of these things enthusiastically. The #Rhodes must fall campaign by the UCT students started another form of debate which is now getting everyone talking and expressing their feelings in all sorts of manner out there. In February we had our eyes set on SONA (state of the nation address) and the drama that came with it. We've heard reports that the public protector, Julius Malema & others are spies and many others that have happened in the space of just 3 months & 15 days.

Focusing on the statues you'll see that this has got everyone talking and has really sparked some sense of unity among SAns even though we differ on the fundamental meaning of these statues. It would be utterly wrong of us to narrowly respond on this issue of statues as just being about statues only. I do believe that there is more to this in that there is an unheard cry rising from the inner soul of SAns seeking for a common goal or cause to fight for. My fear though is that tend to react to these things and when we react to them we address only the symptoms & not the root cause.

In fact in some instances the response can be patronizing & annoying because it simplifies the issues at hand. Look at the Marikana tragedy and how the employers & government said these were just acts of criminality but we ended up with more than 30 people dead at the hands of the government of the people. We just recently played down the statement made by King Zwelithini and now KZN is in anarchy because of what he said. There have always been a cry of unemployed youth in this country and now when we see them channelling their anger however misguided it maybe; they are hurting from something deeper than what they are projecting. The truth is ladies & gentlemen; there is an energy & vigour that lies dormant in the soul of the South African community. What we see as criminality, the militancy in our youth, the rising frustrations on issues of transformation and the attacks on the statues & monuments of this country signifies that there is something brewing in the core of this country. What disadvantages us the most is that we have a leadership that is unable to neither discern nor decipher the moment or the times in which we are in. In fact the discrepancy in leadership is such that we cannot take the courage to lead when we are required to lead. We lead by reaction and even when we do that we simply address the problem at hand with no clue at all as to how we can guide that energy & vigour to our own agenda beyond the present. 

Our people are not simply going out there to destroy & cause anarchy but I hear them crying out for something more. They are yearning for something that will unify us and make us all focus in the one vision that will be the South African vision. If you look back in our recent history you'll see that when we have a common goal, agenda or vision; we rally around that until we see it to the end. The lack of that common goal puts us in this position. I myself long for the vision and the idea of South Africa that will be driven by all and for us all. The Americans call it the "American Dream" and however divided they may be especially with their own issues of racism coming to the fore, they still very much believe in the American dream. This as I understand took a lot of years to build & entrench but in all their fumbling they still believe in the American dream. It's their compass and remains very central in their politics. It is my belief that what is brewing in the South African community is an energy & vigour that needs to be driven towards a cause that is nation building in nature. A cause that will stand beyond the fall of the statues, a dream that will outlive the ruling party. Meaning; even when the ANC is not in power but the cause remains relevant. This should cut across all nationalities, colour lines should not matter but the "South African Dream" must rise above all of these. 

The Freedom Charter in my view encompasses what I would call the South African Dream & it embodies it very well more than the NDP (National Development Plan) but its own handicap is that it is linked to the ANC. That then cripples it but its very core and its foundation shows that we had a leadership that sort to drive an agenda for this country & not like the one where the agenda is hijacked from the people. All we hear from our leaders is that let's debate these things and let us be orderly when we address issues. Look if we think that this is simply about statues, foreigners, service delivery, Nkandla, Cosatu divisions & any other burning issues of the now; we are mistaken. We need a common agenda, a centred focus point we need a SAD (South African Dream). We need leaders who can rally us to that point. The ideal SA is within all of us; it only needs to be inspired & nurtured to be realized. It is often said that we did not heal from the wounds of apartheid & I concur with that 100% but healing will come when we point that pain to a positively uniting factor. Uniting is not a problem for us. A common goal is. 

Work-shopped by Lungelo Madubela

Success is in Removing the Default Menu/Button.

Its been a while since I've sat and written something down. The idea of putting something down is always with me but I constantly shelve it for next time and that has got to change. I must say that 2015 is slowly chipping away but the amount of drama, fun & energy it brings with is absolutely amazing just by judging the early events that we've seen thus far. I however don't want to delve into the happenings of our current environment but rather the deep conflicts of our being and the things that stand in way of achieving our desired goals.

I want to talk about removing the default menu/button which I regard to be anything that is designed to keep you within what you normally regard as your limit. I am choosing to use a word that is synonymous with computers as they come with preset programs that are used as guides to the user. These programs are nice to have but if you only follow their promptings you'll learn nothing from these devices. To be able to learn more you should be able to ignore the default menu at times & venture into new spheres all on your own. In fact we have a lot of testimonies these days because our very own kids are the champions of working outside the default menus or buttons. My son can operate any device without going through the default menus or settings.

 The most daunting thing about the reliance on these menus is that when you seem to lose your sense of venture & zeal; you quickly fall back to the default settings and that can scupper ones progress for good. The same is the reality of life that those who desire to succeed must remove any "default menus/buttons" in their lives so that they can forge a new path for themselves. There are a lot of these in our lives. The environment that you've grown up in can be your default menu in that what you know can become your limitation and your fall back position. The fact that you've grown up in a family where there is not a single entrepreneur does not mean that you can't be one. You may be from a family of teachers or a background of non-graduates; but you can chose to rise above all of those limits.

You see fear is one of the reasons for seeking to stick with the known or familiar surroundings. The unknown is frightening & carries with it a lot of risk whilst the known is safe but terribly stagnating. I myself have been a victim of my own default menus/buttons and continue to hinder me in my other ventures. I have since identified these and am currently working on them. If you look across history you'll see that those who make a difference or succeed in life are those who decided to defy what is familiar to them and may sometimes be seen as being rebellious. Success is not always mined on the strength of what is proven & tested because there is no greatness in that. True greatness & success comes without the strings of known territories but it is with vision, passion & focus that the unknown is conquered.

What you know is valuable but don't let it stand in the way of what you could become because that might be invaluable to us all. Abraham is one of the true pioneers of the unknown territories and he conquered all of the in each step he took to venture into the unknown. Faith in ones abilities is essential but more than that you have to trust that God is looking out for you at all times. If you fall it's fine but it's not the end of the road.  It is in falling that we learn to rise up again.

Work-shopped by Lungelo Madubela

Quieting the Mind

It's been a wonderful week for me but there was a lot of turbulence in the mind. You know when your mind wants to champion everything that you do. In fact ever since I've decided to continue with my writings i find that there are a lot of topics that are pitching for a spot light, particularly this week. This has been so hard for me such that i decided to make all of this the subject of my topic this week. The mind is a very competitive element of our being and if left to it's own vices can even lead one to nowhere.

I even gotten to a stage where i thought about a line in the movie The Last Samurai. Tom Cruise is an American soldier captured by the Samurai warriors and they happen to develop a relationship which leads to them teaching him the way of the Samurai. In a duel as he learns this way of fighting with swords he get's defeated and one of the Japanese proteges says to him, "to many minds". Its a funny line but what he's implying is that he has a lot in his mind and until he can master that fact he won't master his fighting skills. In a nut shell he was telling him to zone his mind to a place where he can only think and concentrate on what he's doing and nothing else.

Quieting the mind is not an easy thing to do because the mind is a factory reason; rational; sense and logic. We all know that we need those things because those are the things that keep us safe. It would be utterly stupid to act without reason or any of the things that  show that you've taken time to think before you act. Here's the thing, the mind's duty is really to caution us not to take unmeasured risks or do anything you might regret at the end of the day. But sometimes it can stand in the way of great things because without risk there is little reward. Just think about the moment where Madiba was to make the most important speech of his life binding his fellow comrades in it as well.

Can you imagine the kind of noise & turbulence that engulfed his mind at the time, worse even the line where he says "if needs be this is an ideal for which am prepared to die". Those words don't come without the presence of great adversity in oneself. It's like he didn't understand what he was saying and someone needed to wake him up & tell him that you are asking for a death sentence here. This speech was not made in the absence of the mind i believe, but in the quietness of the mind. Quieting the mind is about identifying that life or history defining moment and plunge yourself into it. That moment is where all of us have been to or are faced with everyday of our lives. This is so huge such that it determines whether or not you'll be wearing the crown or you'll be watching someone else wearing it.

Another example in the bible is David. This boy at the time must have been outside his mind. What was he thinking? Going against Goliath in the presence of great men of war who saw this giant & were paled with fear at the site of him. David with no armor, no sword and no war experience decides that this is his moment. With just one shot from his sling, he defeats him and that moment would define his life forever. Nothing makes sense from this story, logic cannot define it, reason will fall short & intellect will always fail but the truth of the story is that David's life was different from that moment. People stopped seeing a shepherd boy but they saw a king.

I have some turbulence of my own on a daily basis and the truth is that we all have our own. It's all about safety you see, we want to be safe. We don't want to go against the tide. A quote I like from the Julius Caesar book by William Shakespeare goes like this "there is a tide in the affairs of men. Which, taken at the flood, leads on to fortune. Omitted, all the voyage of their life is bound in shallows & misery. On such a full sea are we now afloat, and we must take the current when it serves, or lose our ventures." Ladies & gentlemen, we all understand these moments that Brutus is talking about. Moments where when you look back in hind sight; you know that you allowed the noise in your mind to steal from you the crown. Am posing a challenge to all of us. For once move out of the safety zone and live cause you might just change your life forever.

Work-shopped by Lungelo Madubela

Betrayal & forgiveness: The Et Tu Brutus effect.

This is not the easiest of topics to talk about especially for me because I have both been on the receiving end and as the perpetrator of betrayal as it were. May be my writing of this is for my personal healing but I believe that it will help others as well. I have a line from a story known by most especially the Bantu education folk who have learnt these stories over the years & still find them interesting. This story was made famous by William Shakespeare one of the best writers in the human history. The assassination of Julius Caesar is one of the stories that bring to light the sin of betrayal & the impact it has on a person particularly when it’s by someone you know.

The legend says that when the senators attacked Caesar he resisted and fought them until a moment where he saw Brutus. It is believed that he uttered these words “Et tu, Brute?” meaning you too Brutus. Of course other scholars say he didn’t say nothing while another said that Caeser said “you to my son” saying these words to Brutus. The impact of the betrayal however cuts deeper than just the words that Julius said as it was the monumental realization of the fact that a close friend was also part of the people that carried knives to stab him. He’s resilience & fighting finesse was all dried up by the knowledge of the fact that a trusted friend, partner or child or someone very close to him had in fact conspired against him. Let’s face it folks, that it’s not the size of the betrayal that counts most of the time but who executes it.

Most people who are usually spectators or speak outside of the scenes of betrayal usually emphasize their analysis on the size of the act whilst the affected individual is traumatised by the perpetrator. You see betrayal is one of the’ selfish sins under the sun because it’s about taking from someone or at someone else’s expense. Betrayal is the breaking or violation of a presumptive contract, trust, or confidence that produces moral and psychological conflict within a relationship amongst individuals, between organizations or between individuals and organizations. This explanation is from Wiki and does sum up the content of what betrayal is. But still what it is cannot be compared to the scars that it engraves emotionally, psychologically & spiritually.

When this is visited upon you, it can kick God out of your life, the will to live and can certainly deaden a part of you for a very long time. Your zeal for life can be snatched away & a great deal of resentment, hatred and numbness could be the order of the day. It is also possible that you’ll start shrinking your environment either because of shame and therefore you don’t want people to feel sorry for you. I tell you in times like these even a small whisper or laughter in a corner out there it’s as if it’s directed at you. The amount of anger is sometimes hoarded inside or misdirected to whomever finds himself/herself in its way. At this point words like forgive & forget become a distant memory as a victim is trying to make sense of the situation. Words like I have the right to be angry seem to be much more comforting. You need people to understand why you are angry and justify your withdrawal from friends & family.

I am sharing with you this because I believe there is no shame in being betrayed. This is a circle of life in which lessons are learned. I can assure you that it is not about learning to trust others any less but it’s about being able to harvest from such the courage to live a life full of love and forgiveness. I am sure that the greatest lesson from betrayal is forgiveness. When you are shuttered, all of that numbness has indwelled you & the anger is as the size of Mount Kilimanjaro there is a voice that tells you to forgive. You know it and it haunts you daily and am telling you now it’s not going to stop unless you chose to yield to it. The chance of living life to the fullest rests on it, so that you are free from this bondage. Failure to forgive brings with it a trust less, non-social & emotionally damaged life forever. Bitterness becomes the stretch marks that will live with you and no matter how much you try to hide it, it rears its ugly head.

So don’t let the et tu, Brute effect sink you into the world of destitute & despondency. Instead seek to love more, seek to trust more, and seek to live a life that allows others into your life. Be selective of who you bring closer but don’t let the scars of betrayal dictate to you who to trust and who to let into your life. Don’t banish the “Brutus” either especially when he/she has asked for forgiveness & atonement from their misdeed. The value of this person may have diminished for a moment but the future contribution maybe more colossal & monumental than the actual act of betrayal. In fact the act & lesson of being able to forgive is far greater that of being forgiven. Remember blessed is the hand that gives than the one that takes.

Betrayal begets forgiveness in that it gives you a chance to rise to a position where you give another person a second chance. It puts you in the same position that Jesus was in & he chose to forgive even when remorse wasn’t shown and forgiveness wasn’t asked for. Don’t wait for him/her to come in order for you to forgive. Do it for you and for your own peace of mind. In the aftermath of great betrayal let forgiveness sit on the throne & peace will reign.

Workshopped by Lungelo